Instead, they're now off to hell without even their virgins to console them:
Armed Islamic militants attempted to storm the U.S. Embassy in a bold attack Tuesday using automatic rifles, hand grenades and at least one van rigged with explosives, the government said. Syrian security forces killed three of the attackers and no Americans were hurt.
The attackers apparently did not breach the high walls surrounding the white embassy compound in a diplomatic neighbourhood of Damascus. But a Chinese diplomat was slightly injured by a stray bullet during the attack, China's government news agency said.
A witness said one Syrian guard outside the embassy also was killed, but the government did not immediately confirm that. At the embassy in Damascus, as at most American embassies worldwide, a local guard force patrols outside the compound's walls while U.S. marine guards are mostly responsible for guarding classified documents and fighting off attackers inside the compound.
After the attack, pools of blood lay splattered on the sidewalk outside the embassy, along with a burned car apparently used by the attackers. A sports utility vehicle with U.S. diplomatic tags had a bullet hole through its front window, and the glass windows of nearby guard houses also were shattered.
This doesn't sound like they were up against the A-team, folks, but be glad that the Syrians made short work of them. An actual invasion of the embassy compound, besides making matters worse, would have elevated popular and media superstitions about the anniversaries of events such as 9/11.
Fortunately, a Canadian embassy has not been attacked in the same fashion.
But we will not have Marine guards inside to kick the invaders' ass, but diplomats full of windy Pearsonian rhetoric.
Perhaps our security strategy will be simply to bore the attackers to death.