Friday, October 28, 2005

Goosed

Did you know that not only is moving a Canada goose off your property is a criminal offence, but that one can get up to six months in jail for each bird you move?

This Alberta golf course groundskeeper found out the hard way:

Peter Francis, a maintenance foreman at the Leduc Golf and Country Club, pleaded guilty yesterday to the rare federal offence of moving migratory birds without a permit. The maximum sentence includes a $300,000 fine and six months in jail per bird.

Mr. Francis later said he gulped when Crown attorney Erin Eacott read out in court the maximum possible consequences for his waterfowl-related crime.

He had moved 80 geese, which were molting and looking after their young at the time, to a nearby lake last June after rounding them up using a rope and herding them into a trailer.

The presiding judge could have sent Mr. Francis to jail for 40 years.

"I didn't know that this law brought so much prison time," Mr. Francis said outside the courthouse in Leduc, which is about half an hour south of Edmonton.

Instead, the judge slapped him with a $500 fine and said that the publicity of the case has likely deterred others from doing the same.


Fine him? Hell, they should have paid him!

The Canada goose, like the Canadian Tire guy and Margaret Atwood, is one of the more annoying symbols of our country.

Yet in a way, it is a perfect symbol of our Canadian (Liberal) values.

It squats in huge flockson private property with no respect to the owners, strips the land bare, keeps shitting all over it, honks and pecks at anyone who gets in their way, then moves on once it's finished ruining the land.

It is all a man can do to keep from grabbing a machine gun and turning a flock of Canada geese into a pile of bloody geese guts. You'd do the same, if you had the opportunity.

Source: Globe and Mail

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

This bit of nonsense is so typically conservative. Let's give life a chance. Is it really necessary for humans to dominate and kill everything on the planet to suit our recreation. A little poop on the grass is not justification to wish for the extinction of an important species.

You are a sad little person and you have my pity.

Les Mackenzie said...

Tongue in cheek means nothing to Anonymous lefty trollers unless of course it comes from their own side.

K. Shoshana said...

You know I always like the taste of stuff roasted goose. But of course, I am only a sad little woman happy with my lot at the top of the food chain.